im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
