with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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