Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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