i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
