This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
