what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
