would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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