My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
