Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
This house was built for laser tag.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Randomize
