dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
