no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
