Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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