it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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