He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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