Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
