We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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