I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
