Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
