I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
