how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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