I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
