Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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