Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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