Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
A+ Viking dick
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