I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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