I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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