I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Randomize
