i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
