"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Come see our sink grown plant.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
