break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Randomize
