Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
