Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
