Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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