Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
