ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
