it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
