2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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