Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
