with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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