forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
