i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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