I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Of course I have a pirate flag
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
