How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
