Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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