This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Randomize
