did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
