Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
