the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
