The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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