Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
